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Online Predators! PLEASE READ!!!


The internet can be a wonderful place, a place to find old friends, keep in contact with current and meet new friends.

But what happens when one of those "friends" turns out to be something a little more sinister? Someone that you never guessed they could be.
The internet holds a number of "issues" that can become a problem. I want to look at two of the biggest issues here:
* Online/Internet Predators
* Cyber BullyingWhat they are, how to spot them and what you can do if you are a victim or know someone who is. Either on this very forum or in real life.

Now, I am not only talking about pedophiles as predators. These people can target us adults just as badly, causing immense hurt and suffering. It's these predators I want to look at first.


Online/Internet Predators

Definition: A online predator uses the Internet to hunt for victims to take advantage of ANY way, including sexually, emotionally, psychologically or financially. Online predators know how to manipulate people by creating trust and friendship where none should exist.
(Source -

Predators can come in any form or shape. They can be mothers, brothers, the boss, even that woman that sits opposite you who is the model employee. It can literally be anyone.

You see, when you're online, you can't read someone like you would if you met them in real life. People behind a computer screen can be anything they want. You don't know if I am actually sitting here wearing only a feather boa drinking margaritas out of one of those beer cup hats and a extra long straw.

You just don't know who you are talking to. If you see someone in real life, 9 out of 10 times you can get a vibe. The way the person holds themselves, talks, or the way they hold themselves when they talk.

Behind a keyboard you can't see that.

So what does happen if you are targeted by an online predator?

Well that's a good question and there isn't really set rules about the how... but they do tend to follow the same pattern:

1. Agreeing with everything you say "as if you were soul mates" or someone who just "really gets you".
2. Anxious to move from an online site, e.g. dating, or to private methods of communication such as email, instant messaging, Skype, texting, or telephone calls.
3. Asking for personal information: where you work, where you went to school etc.
4. Wanting to know about your emotional state, getting you to pour your heart out to them.
5. Start talking about how much they like you only after a few chats. They seem to be too interested too soon.
6. Trying to disrupt relationships, suggesting that your friends and family don’t understand, appreciate, or love you - but the abuser can.
7. They know things about you that you didn’t tell them – they’ve done their research.
8. They seem to know when and where you are online. They say "I know you were online because I saw your posts" or they are always showing up in the same chatroom.
9. Share a common interest.

One of these things on their own can be harmless but if you put two, three or more together then you may have an issue.
They will lure you into a false sense of security with them but behind your back they will be playing you against your friends and family. Predators can be male or female and prey on both male and female. They don't gender discriminate.

When you discover you have been the victim of a online predator, then you can see the things that they have done or were doing - how they have turned you against people you thought were friends. Well, they always were your friends, but your mind had been played with. Your thoughts were twisted.

This will leave you feeling vulnerable and embarrassed that you let the person take advantage of you for as long as they have and the feeling will make you hate yourself for letting it happen to you.

HOWEVER, this forum is our sanctuary and I want ALL members to feel comfortable logging on and enjoying the forum just as much as anyone else here. Therefore, staff NEEDS you to TELL US when something is going on. COME to one of the admins, one of the mods, the contents, Roman... we can't help you if we don't know.

Even if you THINK a friend on here is being harassed by someone, please tell us. We will help you and we will do it discreetly.

On a PERSONAL level - Admins here have a ZERO (0) tolerance policy on people who exhibit manipulative or blackmail(ish) behavior. If you gave someone your email, phone number, etc... or you said something about someone and now they are threatening to expose that information if you report them, COME TO ME! I will help you!

In real life, out there in the wide world, if you think you are being targeted by an online predator, you can again come to us, we can help or go to your local police. Keep copies of the correspondence between you. Call your local help lines. If you are a child/minor, speak to your parents, your teachers or go to the police directly.

You have a voice. Do not be ashamed to use it.

This OP was written by @Kwiff


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